How to tell if a guy likes you

If you have to wonder about this subject, chances are you're dealing with the reticent type. The outgoing, self-confident male will leave you with no doubt about his feelings. He will tell you straight out and repeatedly. In addition, you're likely to fall over him very time you turn around, and if he's not in your face, he'll be texting, calling, e-mailing or otherwise trying to stay constantly connected to you.

Not all men are so open about their emotions. The one you're wondering about may lack the self-confidence to show his feelings. He may fear rejection. Perhaps he has been hurt by an unscrupulous partner in the past or he may just be young and inexperienced in dealing with the opposite sex. He may be just plain shy, or be in awe of your popularity, your attractiveness or your social position in the community. There could be a hundred reasons for his hesitancy.

If you feel really attracted to this person, you'll have to take the first step. However, before you take a chance and give him the encouragement he obviously needs, you need to be sure that he really is attracted to you. After all, you'd feel very foolish sending "Come hither" signals to a guy who couldn't care less about you. Here are a few clues to look for which will indicate that the interest you have in him is returned:

(1) He'll pop up unexpectedly at places he knows you're likely to be : your Friday night hangout, your Sunday church service, or the grocery store where you go shopping. You may notice his car cruising past your house. If you catch his eye, he'll wave, but may lack sufficient courage to actually approach you.

(2) He may try to break into the group you hang around with, or become a pal with your brother or visit the family who lives next door, anything which will insert him into your environment without running the risk of being alone with you and having to think up things to talk about, which he fears he couldn't do.

(3) He'll offer to do kind things for you, probably while still in a group setting; he'll offer to get you and your girl friends a cold drink on a warm day, he'll be happy to drive your group to the movies and home afterward, he'll bring a couple of dozen doughnuts to the skating arena to be shared with the gang.

(4) When you glance his way suddenly, you'll often catch him looking at you, but when he sees you looking, he'll quickly turn his attention in another direction.

(5) When you're with a group, he'll usually manage to be sitting or standing beside you, or at least position himself as close as possible without being too obvious. 

6) As he gradually gets braver, he'll find excuses to touch you, give high-fives, pat you on the back, give you a playful poke on the arm, or gently kick the toe of your shoe.

(7) He may start to give you the odd call in the evening, but he'll always have a logical excuse. Do you remember what time the meeting starts? What's Johnny's mother's name? He wants to send her a birthday card. Actually, he's hoping that you'll pick up the conversational ball and start it rolling, and then you two could have the first of many cozy heart-to-heart chats.

(8) This is the time to test the waters. Is he really interested in becoming more than a casual acquaintance? You've had many indications that this is probably the case. Let's find out for sure.

Casually mention that there's a movie playing on Saturday night you really want to see, but, darn it, everyone in your group is busy, and you'd never go a to movie alone. You really hate to miss it, but then, (heavy sigh!) the DVD will probably be out next year.
If there is any interest there at all, your reluctant Romeo will jump at the chance to escort you to the movie, (merely to satisfy your desire to see it, of course). He can rationalize it any way he chooses, but it's still a first date.

On Saturday night, when you're sitting together in the darkness, since he's already passed the hurdle of touching your hand, (remember the high-fives?), what could be more natural than to hold hands during a scary part, or a sad part, or a happy part of the story? This time you'll have to rationalize the reason.

If you choose to continue it, the romance should proceed naturally from this point on. You can be assured that you've probably got the best of the bunch. Still waters do run deep. The outgoing self-confident Roman candle type of guy will have probably burned himself out by this time and moved on to his next conquest.

Your reluctant Romeo, who bestowed his affections after slow and careful deliberation, is probably a keeper. Your patience and investigative skill will have paid off in producing a permanent partner.